Finding Joy

Following our return last week I found I was in a bit of a low energy mode but still managed to have some good days and good visits, including a wonderful book club session on Thursday afternoon with some very lovely ladies and a lunch with my friend Liz at Joey's on Friday afternoon. It was nice to catch up with Liz, she is looking forward to the arrival of her first grandchild in early January and talked of the warmer climates of Arizona, where she and her husband have a place.

Today's reading in the book 'Jesus Calling' by Sarah Young is quoted below -

"No matter what your circumstances may be, you can find Joy in My Presence. On some days Joy is generously strewn along your life-path, glistening in the sunlight. On days like that,  being content is as simple as breathing the next breath or taking the next step. Other days are overcast and gloomy; you feel the strain of the journey, which seems endless. Dull gray rocks greet your gaze and cause your feet to ache, yet Joy is still attainable. Search for it as for hidden treasure.

Begin by remembering that I have created this day; it is not a chance occurrence. Recall that I am present with you whether you sense My Presence or not. Then, start talking with Me about whatever is on your mind. Rejoice in the fact that I understand you perfectly, and I know exactly what you are experiencing. As you continue communicating with Me, your mood will gradually lighten. Awareness of My marvelous Companionship can infuse Joy into the grayest day."

I was challenged to put this into practise first thing this morning when I looked outside and realized that it was indeed an overcast and gloomy looking day and, on top of that, it was snowing and I could hear from the radio that the roads were slippery. I gave my worries about driving on slippery roads to the Lord and continued to get ready to go for my pre-chemo labwork and oncologist visit.

As part of my morning, I had arranged to have coffee with a lady I had been in contact with through my autism work at 1100. In the past, with a 0730 lab appointment and 0900 oncologist appointment, there has been ample time to accommodate an 1100 coffee date. Today, it was pushing it and my feet did literally ache by that time.

Normally, the lab is open a little before 0730 so people can grab a number, run next door to the Outpatient Clinic area for their lab requisitions and return in time for the number to be called. Today they were behind, possibly due to the road conditions, the area where the numbers are obtained had a see through locked panel around it. There were several people already waiting so I continued on to the Outpatient area to get my requisition without a number. The clerk seemed a little rattled and told me that I would need to take a seat while she did a few other things. One of the things that seemed important to her before looking after me was turning on the TV, not my priority but I tried to put myself in her shoes and took some deep calming breaths. Once my requisition was in hand I went back to the lab area, where the original 'wait-ees' continued to wait along with some new ones. The lab still wasn't open so I sat down and chatted to the lady beside me. When the lab did open I found it interesting that a couple of the last people to arrive in the area were the first people to rush into line for a number. I offered to get a number for the lady beside me as I got in line myself. We didn't do too bad, numbers 6 and 7. In order to 'look for the hidden treasure' I gave her the number 6 and kept 7 for myself. We had our blood drawn in chairs right next to each other as we continued to chat. She was new to the whole routine so I was able to fill her in.

When I went back to the Outpatient Clinic area for my 0900 appointment, I was informed that the lab tech hadn't taken enough blood and they hadn't been able to complete my CBC so back I went to the lab for another try. I was getting serious practise in finding Joy and beginning to get seriously behind in my timing for the day. Once back at my appointment, rather than being given a prescription for an outside pharmacy, I was given one to take to the Cancer Center Outpatient Pharmacy. Once again I waited. I continue to be amused that in our Cancer Center I am treated like a kindergartner by the generally elderly population in the area. There are not too many places where this 'almost senior herself' is made to feel like she is too young to be there. I was finally called to talk to the pharmacist who provided me with instructions for taking the premeds for my new set of chemo drugs. This time the meds were to begin this a.m., but not until I had the go ahead from my blood results.

Back to the Outpatient area I went to see if they had received my new results. No luck. The first dose of the premed was supposed to be 24 hours prior to my chemo time of 0930 tomorrow morning, I was now already behind in that timing and about to get more behind. I had forgotten my cell phone so they wouldn't have a way of contacting me about the results until I returned home. I still had my coffee date to attend and no way to contact her to cancel. More searching for hidden treasure ;)

I had thought I would have time to talk to the Parking office about suspending my payments while on disability and go and see my mother before I left for the coffee date. Not anymore. I talked briefly to the parking people and rushed over to the Second Cup I had agreed to meet this lady at.

Once there, I was very glad I was able to meet with her. She was experiencing some struggles and, even though I had only met her briefly once, there was no stiffness in our conversation. The Joy for me in this encounter came when, as we got up to leave, she turned to me and said "I feel refreshed".

I have since been home to hear the news that chemo is on, my counts were good, yay Neulasta! I took my premed, had some lunch, ran over to my office to give the group some treats (they were looking a little gaunt when I was there on Friday a.m.) ;) Next I tackled Costco where I bought too much (but what a Christmas it is going to be!), and worsened my aching feet situation. On returning home I put the groceries away and my aching feet up - in that order.

Tomorrow it seems I will once again be challenged to find Joy - there is a snowfall warning in effect, we are expecting 10 - 15 cm of the white stuff overnight.

Take care everyone!